In today’s fast paced world, we are often rushing to find the “next best thing”, ignoring the present greatness that stands in front of us. We lack patience and mindful presence, which are two key components of a successful relationship. While we do not learn how to be in relationships, it is a desired and often expected aspect of human behavior. Lack of success in relationships often feels like a failure, and leaves us overwhelmed and paralyzed with doubt and fear.
Statistics show that 50% of marriages end up in divorce. Though this number may seem astounding, it reflects the familiarity of ending relationships, often without exploring what is left. I believe that it’s never too late to rebuild connection. Curiosity is an important tool that can keep the relationship moving forward. Many of us may ask, how can we be curious about someone that we know everything about? How can I desire someone that I have been intimate with for the past 20 years of my life? Do I have a sexual addiction? Will I ever be good enough for my partner? To some, these questions may result in anxiety and confusion. I often hear my clients say “we were trying to work on our relationship on our own.” Yet, how do you work on a relationship “on your own”? How do you find curiosity and interest if you have become familiar with a pattern of monotony and defeat? How do you explore intimacy in a relationship where you haven’t felt desired physically or emotionally in the past couple of years? How can you communicate your individual needs and wants when you cannot agree or discuss what to have for dinner? Therapy is about guided exploration, understanding, and self-discovery. My goal is to help you find the tools and identify the strengths in your relationship that will help reestablish real connection. Today, I invite you to come in and allow the work to begin.
“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”